Family support from mentors helps single mom rise above hopelessness

With the support and guidance she received from her two volunteer mentors, “Monica’s” life soon began to change for the better.

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The year before single mom “Monica” applied to FamilyForward, her oldest child turned 18. While it was a happy occasion, it also meant that the child’s father was no longer required to pay child support. Financially, things were looking pretty bleak for Monica, and it impacted the family’s housing security and sense of stability. Fortunately, Monica made the decision to contact FamilyForward. With the family support and guidance she received from her two volunteer mentors, her life soon began to change for the better.

During her application interview, Monica told the FamilyForward staff what prompted her to finally reach out for help: “I feel defeated. I’m unsure of what’s going to happen with my living situation. It feels hopeless.”

She explained how, after the loss of the child-support income every month, she slowly fell behind on bills. To make up the shortfall, she started putting some expenses on a credit card. Before she knew it, Monica had accumulated more than $10,000 in credit card debt and still wasn’t breaking even each month, even though she worked 40 hours a week.

Rent subsidy removes immediate threat

As soon as the family was accepted into the program, FamilyForward’s rent subsidy immediately removed the risk that Monica and her children might be evicted or displaced. Once she knew their housing was secure, Monica was able to consider how she was going to get back on her feet.

Early on during her time in the program, Monica’s two volunteer mentors asked her to keep track of income and expenses; or, as they put it, “all the money coming in, and all the money going out.” One of her mentors put these numbers into a spreadsheet each week. After a few weeks of this family support, Monica took over the responsibility of updating the spreadsheet with current numbers. This practice gave her a more concrete understanding of where her money goes. The physical act of typing numbers into columns helped Monica develop a new relationship with her money and motivated her to make progress.

Family support builds trust, inspires changes

Because they met with her in her home every week, Monica’s mentors were up-to-date on all the challenges she faced — at work, with her teenagers, and with her own health. Her mentors observed the correlation between Monica’s stress and her discretionary spending. There were times when buying more groceries, or giving the kids more of what they asked for, was Monica’s reaction to stressful situations. Once she identified her habit of emotional spending, she was able to set new goals — mainly, to live within her budget.

With Monica’s new awareness of her spending habits, her mentors suggested she approach her finances with even more strategy. They suggested a schedule for credit card payments that allowed her to pay off some of her debt. They helped her identify the best use of her income-tax refund money — how much she should put toward debt, how much she should put into the emergency fund. Monica told her mentors that, before FamilyForward, she had never thought strategically about money. She even started talking to her teenagers about the steps she is taking to get out of the paycheck-to-paycheck cycle.

Feeling empowered, earning success

During the two years she was with FamilyForward, Monica earned a promotion at work, resulting in an increase in her take-home pay. She decreased her debt and increased her credit score. She started putting money into savings again. In their final meeting, Monica told her mentors that, because of their guidance, “I no longer feel doomed. I feel so much more in control.”

Monica’s story illustrates how important relationships are, as FamilyForward volunteer mentors equip families to learn and put into practice better financial habits. FamilyForward mentors know that people are more than just their checking-account balance. By meeting frequently with Monica, her mentors learned the ins and outs of what challenges she and her family were facing. This knowledge helped them provide the kind of family support Monica needed. Thanks to the trusting relationship they developed with Monica, she felt encouraged and empowered to make meaningful changes.