MENTOR TEAM SPOTLIGHT: Judy Hockenberry and Larry Sophian offer different talents for strong family support

FamilyForward mentors Judy Hockenberry and Larry Sophian used their complementary skill sets to help a single mom conquer overwhelming debt and make a new start.

Larry Sophian and Rev. Judy Hockenberry, FamilyForward mentors

The Rev. Judy Hockenberry and Larry Sophian make a great team. In 2023, they were paired together to serve as volunteer mentors for a single mom in the FamilyForward program. She was over her head in debt and needed financial coaching and other guidance to turn things around for her family, which includes three children. Using their two very different skill sets, Larry and Judy worked together to provide critically needed family support, working to equip and encourage their client throughout her time in the two-year program.

With each new success, Judy and Larry were delighted to witness their client’s growth and improving circumstances. And when their client graduated from the program, the two mentors felt a sense of personal satisfaction at having made a real difference in her life.

We asked Larry and Judy to share a few reflections on serving as mentors.

A way to help people improve their lives

As an accountant who worked with many not-for-profit agencies in his career, Larry knew he wanted to use his professional skills in a new way to help others once he retired. “When I learned about FamilyForward’s mentor program, I thought it would be a great opportunity to help people who were committed to improving their lives.”

“I think my background works very well with a program that is all about getting the family on a more solid financial footing,” Larry added.” I’m able to use those skills to help the family analyze their expenses and develop strategies to reduce expenses to make things more manageable.”

Judy, too, was looking for ways to help people. As a recently retired Presbyterian minister who served for 38 years, her skill set is quite different from Larry’s. “I think my strongest gifts are in being a good listener and being able to meet people wherever they are,” she said. “Even though I may not have walked in their specific shoes, I am willing to try and imagine what that might be like.”

Judy was already very familiar with FamilyForward, because its main office is located at First Presbyterian Church of Arlington Heights, where she served as associate pastor before retiring in 2023. “I was about seven months into retirement. I had already started volunteering at the local hospital and was beginning to think about other volunteer opportunities.” It didn’t take long to be assigned to her first client, working with Larry as her co-mentor.

Putting in the work pays off

Judy and Larry recently celebrated their client’s graduation from the FamilyForward program. They were both thrilled that she was able to pay off her credit card debt and keep up with monthly expenses under their guidance and with their caring encouragement.

Larry noted the importance of regularly reviewing expenses to get them under control. “I was able to use my skills in both reviewing these spreadsheets and developing strategies to deal with finances when things were tight.” Judy really appreciated Larry’s ability to work on their client’s budget spreadsheet: “He knew how to go over that with a fine-tooth comb. That is not in my skill set,” she joked.

But it was Judy who recommended that their client work with a debt-consolidation company — the same company Judy and her husband had worked with to move past debt they had accrued. “Even at a higher socio-economic level, my husband and I found ourselves in some serious credit card debt, so we worked with a company to pay off that debt. Using this company, I knew her debt would be paid, and the monthly fee was nominal. Our client jumped right on my suggestion.”

“It was very satisfying to see her move from dreading when the other shoe might drop in her finances to having confidence that she had the resources to handle something unexpected,” Larry said. “Watching her self-confidence grow during the two years as a result of the improvement in her finances was very gratifying.”

The impact of their coaching was palpable: “I watched our client become a happier person as she began to feel safer financially. A weight was slowly being lifted off her shoulders,” Judy said.

Different talents working together for stronger family support

As Judy and Larry worked together, it was the combination of their two sets of abilities that proved to be ideal as they partnered to assist and encourage their client. And that’s exactly how the family program is designed to work: Two mentors with complementary strengths work with the parent as a team, imparting financial and other life skills, offering empathy, and providing empowering emotional family support.

“My particular gifts are in the area of pastoral care,” said Judy. “I would imagine that all the clients at FamilyForward need a level of care in their lives. They may feel isolated or overwhelmed. They may be grieving, or they may be struggling with raising children. My experience in pastoral care to a wide variety of people allows me to meet our client wherever she is on a given day and/or as we begin the program. The needs change as the program progresses. I can be a consistent presence with a calming attitude. I am steady and trustworthy, and I think those are qualities that most clients find in short supply prior to being part of the FamilyForward program.”

Personal rewards for mentors, life-changing impacts for families

“I think the most fulfilling thing about being a mentor is that you get the chance to walk side by side with an individual and witness their success,” Judy said. “Month by month, the debt receded. Month by month our client stayed on track and every week she sent her budget spreadsheets to us. Developing a relationship with both the other mentor and with the client were very fulfilling for me.”

As for Larry: “I have found that helping the clients I’ve worked with at FF very satisfying, in a hugely different way than the satisfaction I would get from helping my professional clients. With each of the two families I have helped, my co-mentor has brought very different, and complementary, skills to our work. I learned a lot from them, as well as the families, about the various resources that are available in our communities and how people can utilize those.”

Judy believes that the single greatest thing FamilyForward does is to stabilize the housing situation for families in the program. “Once someone knows they will not lose the roof over their head, energy is released to explore ways to save money, improve income, get more education, spend more time with children and so many other things.” FamilyForward helps to relieve that burden, while the client works to get on stable ground in other areas of their life.

Thank you, Judy and Larry, for sharing your many talents in your compassionate and impactful work to empower FamilyForward families.